Just a lovely tidbit

H putting his stamp on the cute outfit I picked. 

He manages to solely nail the good outfits that I like. That's all, have a good weekend! :)

Hold Tight

That's exactly what I'm doing these days. But trying not to hold too tight. Amid all of these changes that Henry is making at what feels like lightening speed, I race along trying to keep up. If I miss a moment, a single photo, practically look away at the wrong time I've missed something new for Henry. That's how quickly he's changing. While I soak up every bit of it and watch in awe while the love just spills out of me for him, I find little bits of me left behind with every stage he moves out of. Let me just say, that I do love change.  In all areas of life. When I don't feel things evolving around me I crave it. But from the moment Henry was born change has become a bittersweet thing for me, and I feel a bit guilty for admitting that. Let me clarify.  I adore every change Henry makes.  I could go on for days on end about all of the things he can do and the things he is learning, the cute faces, the funny moments... but like I've said before it's simply a hard realization that as he breezes through life's stages it is the last time I will see him in that place. We've reached the last time that Henry bunches his legs up under his body like he did when he was inside, and when he was a newborn.  You know, when they sit like little frogs with their tiny tushes sticking straight out as they rest perfectly in your hand. We've passed the stage where we could sit home together all day snuggling, etc. I want to savor every little thing he does and it makes me afraid knowing that, as I'm only human, I won't be able to savor and remember everything. As time goes on entirely too quickly it becomes all too clear that I won't get to spend every minute with him watching.  And you all know my fear of forgetting.  However,

In response to yesterday's news

I just have to share this comment with you all, written by one of my favorite bloggers on Heir to Blair.
She wrote an entry in response to the verdict on the Casey Anthony trial, and though I don't want to get into the trial and details of my views today, this sums up my thoughts on what my heart was feeling yesterday.

"May my little boy view me as someone who knows the answers, who catches him with sure arms when he takes his first leap into the pool, who rocks him to sleep after a hard day.  May he always find comfort in both my arms & heart, knowing that with every fiber in my body, my purpose is to protect him."

 I ran home from work to hold my sweet little Henry, and will continue to do so each and every day so that he knows, like every child should, that his mama loves him and that he can trust me always.

These are, absolutely, the days.

I'm in love with them. 

The longer we are here in Alaska, building this family of ours, the more I find myself missing and dreaming of the midwest.  Of warm, sticky evenings, retreating to cool water in the peak heat of a sunny day... Yes, this is odd coming from someone who runs very warm and is known for loving cool weather.  But I do miss the midwest, for more reasons than I can count.  I miss the family we have there, my favorite restaurants in Iowa, simply strolling downtown and seeing familiar places.  I want those places to be places that Henry knows.  However, I'm working on being present in the now, and wanting these places I see every day for Henry too.  I don't want to move from here some day and feel like I didn't soak up the beauty of our first home together... every first as a family has been here. And here is wonderful.  Here, the sun shines into the middle of the night, the air smells fresh and cool and clean. The mountains are a backdrop everywhere you go, and there's something unique about it here.  I'm trying to just enjoy my surroundings, while we're here...love them, and pass the love to Henry. We are lucky to live here.

No matter the state though, no matter how many miles I am from where I'd love to be, these are the best days of my life without a question. I have been thinking about these last few months every single day, absolutely in awe of them.  I've been entirely emotional over it all, watching this little person grow.  I've found myself keeping lists of moments I love because I'm so afraid of forgetting, as the changes come entirely too quickly.

I even cried at the Pampers commercial , and show it to everyone who steps in our door just because it reminds me of the path we've come down in the last year.  I'll write it here so that I may look back some day and remember these little moments that stopped me in my tracks and made me fall deeper in love with baby H.

Must Write

I am in bed and enjoying a few minutes of silence. I should be enjoying the silent activity of sleeping but thoughts won't slow themselves in my mind just yet. I must write an actual post soon--I'm so anxious to write but I can't get to the computer to do it. Wishing I had a laptop to write in bed and problem solved... But such is not the case. My iPhone insists on auto"correcting" my words and changing them to something else without my permission:) you all know the beauty of autocorrect, it comes up with the
oddest things. So with that I'll save the rest for a real computer. Just wanted to check in and reconnect with all you friends out there. I hope your weeks are off to a sweet start.
My last few days have had rocky patches and today I was gifted with moments where Henry, sitting on my lap, gazed at me with the most special, wide eyed, loving and beautiful expression. I would have spent the rest of my week in those very moments if it were up to me.

Just a minute to say hello

Itching to write for a bit but ever so frustrated that I can't share photos on this computer currently.  It is my goal this week to get to another computer so I can do so. And when I do, I will write. About the little things, the simple things in the weeks past that may not be much but I don't want to forget because I still hold them close...about how the moments fly by me so quickly I can barely hang on, and about how completely wrapped up in love I am with this little boy.
Hope your weeks are off to a lovely start!

Blurry iPhone photo...H is happy on my knees making eyes at each other after we get home from a long day at work. 

Thank You!

Thank you to everyone who has been voting! I went from number 717 when I joined the other day to number 78 today... so thank you! Whenever you think of it, keep the love coming.
Spending the weekend with Eric and Henry, who are sitting next to me giggling at each other over sneezes. Hope you're all having equally fun weekends. What are you/have you been doing?